The Life And Testimony Of Ann Topp (Davis)

Gospel Standard 1870:

Death. On Aug. 6th, 1868, aged 59, Ann Davis, of Easterton, near Market Lavington, Wilts.

She was the eldest daughter of the late Elizabeth Topp, an account of whose experience and death appeared in the “Gospel Standard” in 1854. She was a woman of good experience, and for many years a consistent member of the Baptist church of Lavington.

The Lord appears to have begun his good work upon her soul on July, 17th, 1832. Being in the evening of that day in company with a young man, who afterwards became her husband, and seeing her younger sister pass by, going to the chapel to tell what the Lord had done for her soul, previously to coming forward with her mother to be baptized and join the church, her mind became very solemn; and it was so pressed upon her mind that her sister and mother were on the right side for eternity, and that she was on the wrong one, that a solemn change took place in her soul, and the weight and power of eternal things were from this time much laid upon her mind, seeing clearly that if she died in the state that she was in, an everlasting separation would take place between them.

Soon after this, she heard a funeral sermon at the Independent chapel of this place, the text being: “Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end be like his.” This text and sermon lay with great weight upon her mind. She saw that there was a strait line drawn in the scriptures between the righteous and the wicked, and that her portion was with the wicked. The blessed Spirit opened up more powerfully her last estate, by applying the law to her conscience with its condemning power; so that her sins from childhood came up before the eye of her mind with piercing grief and sorrow; and in her feelings despaired of ever being saved, daily fearing that she was too great a sinner ever to be saved, and that she was left with all the wicked of the earth to be a castaway. Her sins and guilt pursued her, go where she would; so that her blooming countenance and youthful beauty and comeliness were turned into corruption. Rottenness entered into her bones, and she cried, “Woe is me; for I am undone.”

Being at this time married, and living on a lonely hill farm, she felt cut off from all her earthly friends, having no one to speak to of the state of her soul. At times she envied the sheep in the fields, a horse in the roads, and the birds in the air, crying out, “You have no soul to be lost for ever; there is no judgment to come for you; but I have a soul that must be for ever under the just wrath of God, where the worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.”

She was now constrained to leave and come out from a Yea and Nay gospel, works and grace, which she had frequently attended, and she called to leave it for ever. As she could find no one to go into her path, and trace out her experience amongst them, she felt constrained to go and hear that dear despised servant of the Lord, the late Mr. Dark, though she felt unworthy to come to the chapel where her dear sister and mother attended; yet she felt many cries, groans, and wrestlings to go up out of her soul that she might find the crumb under the gospel table; for necessity pressed her often on the Lord’s day to leave her lonely home, and to go in search of the bread and water of life, though, like Esther of old, she seemed to go with her life in her hand, with a “Who can tell but the sceptre of mercy maybe held out to such a worm as I, that I may find favour before the King of kings?” and, like the woman in the gospel, if but a dog might find a crumb in the house of prayer. And often did the Lord lead his servant into her path, and find her out, and speak precious encouraging words unto her precious soul; so that many times she returned to her home with some precious hope that the day of salvation would come; and though she had not told any soul upon earth of the state of her mind, yet the ministry of Mr. D, seemed to tell her the spot that she was travelling in and describe her path, that she could say with Ruth, “Where thou goest, I will go; thy people shall he my people, and thy God my God.” These precious words would follow her: “The vision is for an appointed time; but at the end it shall speak and not lie. Though it tarry, wait for it,” &c.

About this time she dreamt that she saw the Saviour coming in the clouds of heaven, together with his elect, the elect saying, “Blessed is he that seeth the Son of Man coming in the clouds of heaven;” and as this dream lay with weight upon her mind, her conviction and soul-travail become more deep and powerful, and pressed out more earnest desires and groans and tears after that precious Saviour to be revealed to her as her Saviour. As she daily felt more and more of her ruined state, the more did the Lord open up to her the infinite beauty of Christ, in all his suitability to save unto the very uttermost all that came unto God by him; but O she wanted to lay hold of him by precious faith, and to find him as the scapegoat bearing her sins away into the land of forgetfulness. And after wading through two years of travail, grief, and sorrow, the Lord remembered his handmaiden, and delivered her precious soul from the curse of the law, from the guilt and sting of death, and wrought precious faith in her soul; and that faith laid hold of a crucified Saviour, and that brought pardon and peace which filled her with transports of joy; so that she felt that all her sins and iniquities were for ever put away, never to be remembered any more. She saw Jesus the Eternal Son of the Father suffering under the law that she had broken in every jot and tittle, and taking away the handwriting that had condemned her, and nailed it to his cross. Like Moses, she felt she was put in the cleft of the Rock; her soul was so full, and swallowed up in the glory of God, that she seemed lifted up above all the people in the chapel where she was delivered, which was under a sermon by Mr. Dark. For a time she could not tell whether in the body or out of the body; for the glory of the Lord so shined into her soul, and filled her with joy unspeakable; and she felt that had she a thousand crowns she could put them all on the head of Christ. On leaving the chapel, the road and hills all looked different; for old things had passed away, and all things had become new. The glory of God seemed to fill the heavens above, and the earth to be full of his praise. The long wearisome hill she travelled with ease and pleasure; for, feeling that she had Christ set up in her soul, the hope of eternal glory, she had everything to fill her with happiness in time and through eternity. Her partner in life observing a wonderful change in her on the road, began to speak, thinking that she was altered in her feelings towards him; to which she answered, “No, Thomas, I feel the same towards you as my husband; but my soul has been so blest, and is so full of praise and thanksgiving, and so lifted up above everything in this world, that I do not want to converse about anything here below.”

My dear sister, having passed through this divine change, now felt it hard to keep those precious things concealed from day to day; so, after a time, she felt a desire to come forward and follow that precious Christ through the watery grave. Seeing that the great Head of the church had trod the pathway, and that she must tread in his blessed steps, she was made willing to take up her cross and go without the camp, bearing reproach for his name and sake. So, in August, 1834, she was baptized, with four others, by Mr. Dark; and it was a great day to her precious soul. For days after the Lord shined much upon her path.

But the time was with her, as with most of the dear followers of Jesus, she must eat the Paschal lamb with many bitter herbs. She must also be weaned from the milk, and learn doctrine, led about in a waste howling wilderness, and instructed in fiery trials, temptations, and troubles; her pathway strewed with thorns, and a dark cloud over all her past experience. Now her waymarks and evidences seemed lost in her feelings, and for nearly two years she travelled much by night; and in those nights of darkness the howling beasts of prey often came around her helpless soul with their fiery darts and temptations, trying to undermine the foundation of her hope; until at last, feeling her soul sinking lower and lower, she felt that she could not stay at her home any longer. She took up her infant child, wandered from home, went into the church-yard, and began to envy the dead that lay there, crying out with Job, “O that thou wouldst hide me in the grave until thy wrath is past, that thou wouldst appoint a set time, and remember me. O that I had never been born. I am deserted of God and his dear children. I have lost my Saviour, and my interest in that precious Jesus. My way seems hid, and my judgment passed over from my God. Also when I cry and shout he shutteth out my prayer.” But, bless the name of the Lord, though he thus purifies his people, brings them through fire and water, and tries every grace of his Spirit, it is in the end to bring forth glory unto his dear name. At every step that my dear sister took, it seemed to her as if the earth would open and swallow her up. But the Lord appeared most sweetly in the verse of the hymn:

“Saints, at your heavenly Father’s word,

Give up your comforts to the Lord; 

He will restore what you resign,

And grant you blessings more divine.”

So did the Lord fulfil this in shining into her precious soul, making darkness light before her, and bringing her again into the liberty of the gospel. She could now see her signs and read her interest clear. She could see eye to eye with David in sinking in the horrible pit and miry clay, and in being brought forth again with a new song in her mouth, even praise to her God. “This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him, and delivered him out of all his distresses.” She could also say with Jeremiah, that, though her hope seemed perished from the Lord, yet she could add, “Though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies; for he doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the children of men.” Thus she was led to see that the pathway to heaven ever had been a tribulation path, contradictory to human reason.

She had often to drink deeply of the suffering cup of her dear Lord, and in her measure be baptized with the baptism that he was baptized with; and being blest with much of his humble, meek, and patient spirit, she felt willing to suffer with and for his sake, and take up her cross and follow him through evil and good report, and she was at times enabled to look beyond her suffering path to the things that are not seen. Her soul was often fed under the ministry of the late Mr. Warburton and Mr. Philpot, when they have come to speak on week evenings in this place, and also at the Calne anniversary and at Allington. Also Mr. Dark and Mr. Godwin. The “Gospel Standard” also was much blessed to her.

The Lord gave my sister thirteen children, nine of whom he suffered the hand of death to take away.

But to come to her last days on earth. During the summer of 1868, the afflicting hand of God began to be laid upon her mortal body, gradually breaking up her constitution; and on July 21st, it being exceedingly hot, she having exposed herself too much for air, had afterwards taken a violent chill in her chest, &c., from which she never recovered. For nearly a fortnight her sufferings were painful to witness; and the Lord began to withdraw his supporting manifested presence, and suffered a dark cloud to cover all her past experience, so that every past evidence seemed lost in her feelings, and she cried out with Asaph, “Will the Lord cast off for ever? Will he be favourable no more? Is his mercy changed for ever? Doth his promise fail for evermore? Hath God forgotten to be gracious? Hath he in anger shut up his tender mercies?” But the Lord seemed to cover himself with a cloud that her prayer should not pass through.

On July 26th she said, “O! Where is my brother? O! Where is he? Can he lift up his soul unto the Lord in prayer for his poor suffering sister in body and mind, if so be that the Lord may think upon such a worm as I that I perish not?” But though she felt cast out of his sight, she could not but look again and again towards his holy temple with earnest sighs, groans, and tears for the Lord’s divine appearing and blessing. And, crown his name for ever! Her cries and pantings came up before the throne of the Majesty on high with acceptance perfumed through the precious blood of Christ; and though the sufferings of her body were great until the last three days of her mortal life, the blessed Lord delivered her from the fear of death, and from all the powers of darkness. So wonderful and marvellous was her deliverance that many with myself will never forget this side Jordan her blessed deathbed.

During her lifetime she was always manifested as a patient, humble, consistent follower of the Lord Jesus Christ, seeking after the power of real vital, saving religion, often returning from the house of prayer mourning over her leanness and barrenness, and at other times, when the Lord had favoured her with a feeding under the word, how she would go to her home, enjoy her morsel alone, seldom speaking of it to any one; but now the time arrived when she could no longer hold her peace. When I entered her room on Aug. 1st, she held out her arms to embrace me, and having kissed me repeatedly, she said, “O my dear brother, how many times have I envied you at the chapel, when you have been speaking such blessed things in the name of the Lord, and I have been in such a dark, dead, lifeless state, feeling unworthy of speaking to you or any of the Lord’s dear children; but now I can come in with the blessed truths that you have spoken. Yes, I can now speak of the goodness of the Lord to me so unworthy; for he is come, he is come, and removed all my darkness, doubts, fears, and temptations, and has delivered my soul from the fear of death. *This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him, and delivered him out of all his distresses.” Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me; who forgiveth all thy iniquities, who healeth all thy diseases, who redeemeth thy life from destruction, who crowneth thee with loving-kindness and tender mercies. Precious Christ! Precious Saviour! He suffered under the law that I had broken, both in the garden, at the judgment hall, and upon the cross for my sins. He hath finished the work the Father gave him to do; and all that have heard and learnt of his Father’s chastening hand come unto him, and him that cometh he will in no wise cast out; no, not the vilest of the vile. O! Bless him! Praise him! for his mercy endureth for ever. Crown him, crown him, Lord of all!” Feeling my soul broken down at hearing these precious things, I said, “O Ann, you are a favoured soul.” She replied, “Yes, my brother, we shall sit down in the kingdom of heaven together. O! What will it be, what can it be, when we get home and see him as he is, and behold his glory, the glory of the only-begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth?

“‘If such the sweetness of the streams, 

What must the fountain be?'”

Being a little overcome with her sufferings, after a little time she recovered, and said, “I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth; and though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God, whom I shall see for myself and mine eyes shall behold, and not another, though my reins be consumed within me.’ Yes, see him for myself; see those dear hands and feet that were nailed to the cross.”

“And one shall say, ‘What are those wounds in thine hands? and he shall answer, Those with which I was wounded in the house of my friends.” She then said, “‘Blessed are the eyes that see the things that ye see, and hear the things that ye hear; for I say unto you that many prophets and righteous men have desired to see the things that ye see, and to hear the things that ye hear, and have not seen them.'”

Time would fail me to tell all the precious things that flowed forth so sweetly from her lips. Being about to leave her, I said, “I must leave you, my dear sister, as I have a journey to go in the morning,” it being then the middle of the Saturday night. She answered, “Yes, my dear brother, you want rest; but the dear Lord is all-sufficient. May his presence go with you and bless you. If we do not meet again here below, we hope to meet around our blessed Lord in his kingdom and glory above.”

On Aug. 2nd, in the evening, I saw her again, and found her much in the same state of suffering. As I entered her room, she said, “My dear brother, you are come again to see a poor suffering sister racked with pains; but my mind is sweetly fixed, with not a doubt of my eternal interest in a precious Christ. I feel resigned to his righteous will, and can leave my husband and children, and all below, to dwell with Christ, which is far better. There was a needs be for this painful affliction, as the Lord had a special blessing in reserve for me, and I was to drink of this bitter cup of suffering before this sweet manifestation was to be revealed to my soul. O! I pity princes and kings upon their thrones, and would not change states with them under all my sufferings. But I cannot tell you, the pain of my body is so great. Pray for the Lord to release me out of this suffering body.”

The next day I saw her again. Her pains were not so violent. She said, “O my dear brother, the blessed things the Lord hath revealed to my soul. Eye hath not seen nor ear heard, neither hath it entered into the heart of man to conceive what God hath laid up for them that love him. But he revealeth it to us by his Spirit, even the deep things of God. O! What can it be when my soul gets home, to drink immortal draughts of that boundless river of life without bottom, brim, or shore, for ever to behold my Saviour’s face, free from this poor corruptible body, and clothed in the garments of salvation? She then said, “‘And I heard a voice from heaven, saying, Write, Blessed are the dead that die in the Lord from henceforth; yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours, and their works do follow them.’ John saw a multitude that no man could number, out of all nations, stand before the throne and before the Lamb, ‘ clothed in white robes and palms in their hands; and they cried out with a loud voice, saying, Salvation to our God which sitteth upon the throne, and unto the Lamb. These are they that came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb,’ &c. No more dark clouds to fall upon the weary traveller’s path, no more fiery darts from the enemy, no more family trials, troubles, and vexations; all left behind and for ever shut out, and

“‘Not a wave of trouble roll 

Across my peaceful breast.'”

I answered, “No, my dear sister, your precious soul will go forth free of all that life of labour, toil, and suffering that you for so many years have passed through.” She replied, “Yes; no one knows what I have passed through. I have kept it to myself. My pathway has been indeed a rough and thorny path; but what is it all compared to the glory that is to be revealed? Our Lord and Master had to drink of a suffering cup, and wear the crown of thorns before the crown of glory, and was made perfect through sufferings. Bless his dear name, he patiently endured all his heavenly Father’s will, and hid not his face from shame and spitting. Death is swallowed up in victory. The sting is taken away through his suffering and death; and dying saints can sing, 

“”Tis well with them while life endures,

And well when called to die.’

O the glory of his redeeming love!

“’He saw me ruin’d in the fall,

Yet loved me, notwithstanding all.’

He saw me in my sins and blood, and when he passed by he looked upon me, and the time was a time of love. He hath brought forth my soul, and set me in a large room. I will bless the Lord at all times; his praise shall be continually in my mouth; for he crowneth me with loving-kindness and tender mercies. I said, ‘I shall not see the Lord in the land of the living;’ yet hath he delivered me from the pit of corruption. He has cast all my sins behind his back, never more to be remembered.”

One of her children came into the room, and, standing weeping, she said, “Weep not for me, but weep for yourself. You will have to stand before the judgment-seat of Christ.” To another she said, “I must leave you all in the dear Lord’s hands.” He doeth as he pleaseth in the armies of heaven and amongst the inhabitants of the earth.

On Aug. 4th I saw her in the afternoon. When I went to her bed, she was still blessing and admiring the riches and glories of a future state. Though perfectly sensible, as she had been through her illness, she took but little notice of any around her. The infinite glories of Christ and an immortal state seemed to take her attention from all below. After listening some little time, one of my sisters said to her, “Here is Joseph, that you wanted to see once more.” She raised her eyes and arms and kissed me again repeatedly, and said, “O my brother, my dear brother! O the glories, the glories! Crown him! Crown him, Lord of all for ever, for ever! What will it be, O what will it be? An eternity of praise!”

She now, through weakness, could not be heard plainly; but the most that we could understand was almost continually repeating, “What will it be? What can it be? The glory that shall be revealed! O praise him! O praise him! Crown him! Crown him for ever, yes, for ever!”

On Aug. 5th, the day before her death, her talking began to cease; but was still so full of glory, though so weak in body. To the astonishment of all around she began to sing, in such a sweet solemn way, several precious lines of hymns, and continued nearly all the following night, only at times stopping to regain her strength, not taking any notice of any around her. And in the morning, Aug. 6th, her happy soul departed, and entered into the presence and glory of her precious Lord and Saviour, to sing for ever, in a far nobler and sweeter voice, his power to save.

Joseph Topp

Market Levington, Wilts, Jan. 28, 1870