The Life And Ministry Of J. Parnell
Earthen Vessel 1894:
Mr. J. Parnell
Dear Mr. Banks,—In answer to your kind request, let me say, I do not intend writing much about myself at present, as, if the Lord will, a much fuller account will be published in one of my future volumes, both as to my call by grace and also with respect to my call to the ministry.
I was born on August 18th, in the year 1840, in the parish of Waterbeach, Cambridgeshire. When twelve months old, my parents removed into the parish of Stretham, in the same country, where I resided with them till turned twenty years of age. If ever there was a sinner saved by divine grace, and by divine grace alone, that poor sinner is the individual writer.
As far back as memory will carry me, my soul was under deep convictions of sin, so much so that ofttimes there was no quiet within so many days and nights together. For several years in our boyhood my brothers and myself had to attend the Church day-school, and of course were obliged to go to church on the Lord’s-day. Although I was never in heart a Churchman, my mind was decidedly with the Baptist from the very moment of reading Matt. 3. Generally, as the clergyman who officiated was reading his sermon, I used to be praying in my little mind that each leaf he turned over might be the last, for the simple reason that it was perfect misery for me to sit in church.
As time went on, my inward condition became desperate. At times I almost despaired of all hope. A thundering voice seem to say within my soul, “A burning hell shall be thy everlasting portion.” These things drove me to earnest prayer, they lead me to read and search the Word of the living God; but for the time being the heavens appeared as brass, and the inspired truth a sealed book. I saw myself as one unclean and undone. In me was no soundness at all—nothing but wounds, and bruises, and putrifying sores.” There was never any doubt in my mind about the precious doctrine of eternal election; but there were ten thousand doubts almost daily about my personal and spiritual interest in it. I well knew from a secret something within that God was perfect, and, being perfect, He must of necessity have a perfect knowledge, and having a perfect knowledge His people must be perfect in that knowledge. But the mystery for me to have solved was, Did the Almighty from all eternity “predestinate me to be conformed to the image of His Son?” This was the great conflict through which for years I had to pass. All other subjects were utterly insignificant compared with this.
About the last time I attended the above village Church on the Lord’s-day my mind was so distressed that I really thought the devil would have me. The numerous services of the day were without life, interest, or attraction to me. Everything seemed as dead and as lifeless as myself. Therefore, as soon as the benediction was pronounce, I ran from the building like one escaping for his life; for, there is no mistake, Satan is a living person, and he has a wonderful power, and he never exercises it more than when a law-condemned sinner is seeking and crying for pardoning mercy. After this I was privileged to attend the Baptist Sunday-school, and to sit under the faithful ministry of Mr. Joseph Crampin, who preached at Stretham, in the Isle of Ely, as settled pastor for about fifteen years, yet, like the woman in the Gospel who “spent all that she had, and was nothing bettered, but rather grew worst,” so it was with me. This dark state of things continued almost without intermission till I was 17 years of age, when, as the Lord would have it, I was favoured to hear my eldest brother Charles preach one Sunday evening at Landbeach, from these golden words, still full of silver: blessedness to my soul: “Therefore with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation” (Isa. 12:3). Oh, that little word yet! it was all for me; such joy as this had not before been experienced by me. It was indeed a soul refreshing and a Christ-exalting season; the joy was tasted, and this whetted the appetite for more. Nevertheless some time after this I was suffered again to go down into the deep mire, where the depths of misery can only cry to the depths of mercy. The very floodgates of hell seemed to be thrown open and the infernal crew were permitted to encompass me on every hand. My inward condition became darker than ever before. I was almost tempted openly to curse the day of my natural birth. About this time there was put into my hand a copy of Bunyan’s vision of heaven and hell, which was read with all possible speed and eagerness. Bunyan’s condition was bad, thought I, but not worse than mine; for going along beside the river on one occasion Satan strongly urged me by his wicked insinuations to cast myself into the water, and thus to put an end to my awful state and misery; but the Lord graciously prepared the way for my release, for no sooner was the Satanic suggestion propounded than the solemn question—Where shall I spend my eternity?—arose effectually in my mind. The snare was instantly broken, and I withal escaped from the power of the destroyer. Full deliverance did not, however, as yet become the rich experienced hour for which I so much longed and prayed.
The law-terrors had not as yet fully accomplished their God-given mission. For nine years and a-half the law held me as with an iron hand. By night and by day a black condemnation pursued me almost every step, and truly, if the sword of justice had executed its righteous vengeance upon me, it had been no more than I justly deserved and merited: “If thou, Lord, shouldest mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand? But there is forgiveness with Thee, that Thou mayest be feared.”
The sweet manifestation of full forgiveness came to me from heaven in the autumn of 1863, when leaving home one morning with a burdened heart and a broken spirit. I had scarcely gone more than three hundred yards, inwardly wondering what the dear Lord was going to do with me and for me, when, lo! all of a sudden, a bright light from above entered my soul, illuminating the inner man, and at the same time discovering to me Jesus Christ as my Surety and Substitute. The emancipation was gracious, instantaneous, and complete. The Lord’s Christ had become my salvation. In addition to this, the Lord assured me that wheresoever I went He would be with me, and that to bless me. His promise cannot fail, since it leaped from His own nature. Later on I was baptized in the name of the sacred Trinity, and after several years’ great exercises about the ministry, was necessitated to preach the unsearchable riches of Christ, my first text being Heb. 12:13, “Let us go forth, therefore, unto Him without the camp, bearing His reproach,” since which time I have spent nearly twenty years with three Strict and Particular Baptist Churches, besides being privileged to supply many vacant causes; but I mist close with the words, “Hallelujah! The Lord God omnipotent reigneth.”
7, Trigon-road, S. W. (Late of Pimlico), March 16, 1894
J. Parnell (1840-?) was a Strict and Particular Baptist preacher. He severed the pastorate of several churches, included the congregation meeting at Rehoboth, Stepney.
